Wednesday, April 21, 2010

i'm a dreamer

I am such a dreamer. Every now and then it hits me (usually hard) that most of the things i have dreamed of in my adult life (and some from my childhood) have not actually happened. Mainly because it would be highly impossible for them all to happen in one life time. Some of my dreams even contradict themselves. Nonetheless, this never fails to lead me into one of those days where i am more down than up, don't do much talking, b/c i am constantly thinking about how my life would have turned out if i would have gone this direction or that...

Yesterday was one of those days and here are some of the dreams i recounted- i know some of them are laughable but dreams are suppose to be ridiculous sometimes....

being a corporate supersta'- a dynamic team leader or manager

working for the media in production or photography

winning 'so you think you can dance' (i said some were ridiculous)

being a professional violinist

teaching

working for a social needs group in america

being a mother to many

being a wedding photographer or planner

living overseas long term

working in NYC in the fashion industry

living in america long term

opening a store and/or etsy shop for distressed, shabby furniture and other decorative pieces that i re-do


The thing is, i am one of those 'Jack of all Trades, Master of None' type of people. I am good at a lot of things but not great or professional at anything. I also have a pretty short attention span so i get on "kicks" if you will... My day yesterday mainly had to do with not being a professional at something. I had this overwhelming desire to look back on my life and say, I worked as a teacher or in marketing or as a nurse before i had kids...

I'm not complaining, i have nothing to complain about- i love my life and where it is right now. I think no matter where i am, i will dream ridiculous dreams about he future and think about what the past could have been. Simply because i'm a dreamer.

Matt is SUCH a supporter of my dreams. He is not so much a dreamer but more into making dreams reality, which is so good for me. So, for one my my wedding gifts he got me this...
Now i just have to get out there and USE IT. :)

4 comments:

Megan said...

I didnt know you played the violin? Too Cool...

angela said...

no girl, i don't play. i just always dreamed of learning. i checked into lessons multiple time but never did it:(

Unknown said...

this kinda made me tear up. You're a great sister and an awesome person. The mommy dream will definitely come true and you will be an amazing mommy :) I love you.
sister

Laura said...

Oh, Angela. I am having major lens envy right now.... Have fun with your new toy! I can't wait to see what you do with it.